Reading Aloud

Reading aloud

To each other

Reading allowed 

To each other

Intimacy shared

Iterate the literate

Chapter verse

Shaman nurse

These dog days

Drifting by

Contentment

You and I

Spilling words

Spilling worlds

On cushions

Under clouds

Reading aloud

Reading allowed

Ambition

Restless man

What are my goals?

It used to be

Survival.

But now

Since my revival

Survival's not enough

But goal setting

Is tough

Dare i dream

Of further

Freedoms?

Following my bliss

Will surely

Lead to this.

My life reset 

To teen

Before things

Intervened

Director  reset

The scene

Expunge all 

In between

where I've been

Who I've been

What I've seen

 What I've spent

What I resent

What I repent 

I'm bent, but

I'm not broken

New words

Need to be spoken

And every breath

Until my death

A thankful

Peaceful

Graceful

Grateful

Great full breath

To nourish and

Flourish the rest

Of this Restless,

Rusty, lusty,

Teenage, middle age

Turn the page

Ambition

Just because

You kissed me 

and touched me

Ever so gently

As i lay sleeping

Waking 

from my reverie 

To my reverie

It will always

Be alright

It will never be

Not alright

Perspective

We are neither

And yet we are both

I think she is an 

Indian Princess

She thinks I'm a

Rock star pirate

I think she is 

Gorgeous and

She thinks I am

Handsome

We both think 

the other is hot

And we both

Think the same

That we are not

The things we

Uncover

Through the 

eyes of a lover

When we see

Ourselves

In and through 

and with

each other's eyes

See through

Each other's disguise

Beyond the bridge

Of sighs

We've truly found

The prize

Universary

This is my first Universary

Would have been my 24th Anniversary

I am awake and upset

My task today is to enter

What used to be my home

Which is now a house

Foreboding

I will sort what is mine

From what is hers

I will label what was ours that 

I don't want to argue about

I never want to argue about

I won't ever argue about

I will throw away and recycle

Years of dreams that

Couldn't be, that

Wouldn't be

And now never will

My ex is away on vacation

And the judge had his say

That while she is away

I can cull my effects.

Vacating while vacating

Separate vacations

I am eager to strip away

The ghosts of gaslit confusion 

that still make me flinch

of

Suffering the insufferable

of

Accepting the unacceptable

of

Tolerating the intolerable

of 

Enduring the unendurable

of

Living the unlivable

My night terrors of trying to swim

With every stitch I ever owned

Impeding my movement like a

Huge wet gorilla suit

And the weight of the keys

around my neck

That open doors once mine

Choking the life out of me

Soon to be shed

Soon to be dead

Everybody knows

...... I tried......

I have moved on

My story is happier

than hers.

I walk in the sun away

From the gaslight

My shadow clean

behind me

I am catching up to 

Who I was 

Who I am

Who I will become

Embracing life

Unstifled

Embracing love

Unbridled passion

For all that my senses

Can feel

But for now

In the lonely

Wee small hours

I ache and vomit

All regret

And duty

Forever.

July 29, 2013

Trepidation

I face the morrow with

Daunting dread

Hoping I can

Keep my head

For my children 

For my life

My greatest burden

A hateful wife

Not content

To just consume

My heart, my time

My very reason

Entitlement

She now commits

The greatest treason

And I just want 

what's best for all, but

I want what's mine

Not hers, not ours

Not theirs, not yours

My life is mine

To be free at last

But for this clash

The tires are skidding

Waiting for the fatal crash

Of Her

I want to spend

All of my time

All of my love 

All of my gifts

With her, on her, in her

Interlocked,

Wrapped and 

Woven

Our love 

and gifts

As one

With me, on me, in me